Catholic Couples and Contraception

Summary

Christopher West tackles the practical question that follows from the Church's teaching on contraception: if contraception is immoral, what are Catholic couples supposed to do when they have a just reason to avoid pregnancy? He walks through the logic of Theology of the Body — that sex is a renewal of wedding vows and a sacramental gift — and shows why abstinence during fertile times is a fundamentally different moral act than contraception, even though both can result in the same physical outcome of avoiding pregnancy.

Key Points

Sex as renewal of wedding vows

• If a couple understands sexual union as a renewal of their wedding vows — a total, free, faithful, and fruitful gift of self — they will never want to violate those vows
• When a just reason exists to space children, the couple can choose to abstain during fertile times rather than falsify the language of the body

Abstinence as an act of love

• The ability to abstain from sex is not a burden but a sign of authentic freedom
• If a couple cannot abstain, their love is called into question — because love, by definition, involves the freedom to say yes or no
• We are persons made in God's image with freedom and reason, not animals ruled by instinct

Contraception and the dignity of the person

• When we "spay or neuter" ourselves with contraception, we reduce the sacramental gift to the level of animals driven by biological impulse
• Contraception undermines the very freedom that makes the sexual act a genuine gift of self

Natural family planning and God's design

• During fertile years, for approximately two-thirds of each cycle the woman is naturally infertile — God designed the body this way
• Having sex during naturally infertile times is not contraception — it is accepting exactly how God made the woman's body
• The couple is not doing anything to the act to render it infertile; they are simply receiving the body as it already is

The "dead grandma" analogy

• The difference between contraception and NFP is like the difference between euthanasia and natural death
• The end result may look the same — grandma is dead, or pregnancy is avoided — but the moral reality is completely different
• One involves a deliberate act against life or fertility; the other accepts nature as it unfolds

The Church's definitive teaching

• John Paul II declared that contraception is "so profoundly unlawful as never to be for any reason justified"
• This is not a prohibition rooted in negativity but an invitation to discover the deeper meaning of human sexuality

Notable Quotes

"If you can't abstain from sex, your love is called into question — because love always involves freedom." — Christopher West

"When we 'spay or neuter' ourselves, we reduce the great sacramental gift to the level of the animals — creatures ruled by instinct rather than persons made in God's image." — Christopher West

"The difference between contraception and natural family planning is like the difference between euthanasia and natural death — same end result, completely different moral reality." — Christopher West

"Contraception is to be judged so profoundly unlawful as never to be for any reason justified." — John Paul II (as cited by Christopher West)